'The Quest For Freedom; Of The Mind.'

''I'm trying to free your mind... But I can only show you the door. You're the one that has to walk through it.''

''The body cannot live without the mind.''
Morpheus, The Matrix



It felt like being lost in the arctic, a vast plain land...but with no feeling, no cold, no frost-bite...nothing.

It was like being in a world on your own. No...more like a nightmare whose welcome sweet end was not forthcoming.
She could not shout, warn other un-wary souls of this god-forsaken abyss. She had no voice, no words. She felt nothing. No fear, what was there to fear? No hate for being stuck here, being subjected to this. She was the one to blame. She made her bed, why not lie in it, it was only fair, no?
Atleast in an abyss one could feel...something. Be it the biting cold, the constant eerie howling of the wind, the darkness...but this?

She had done this to herself. It had been gradual but she deserved all that was happening to her. No, she was no 'sadomachosist' or anything. She just wanted to take responsibiity for her actions, her stupid actions...

It started off as a slight nudge...grew slowly like a bad cancer, spreading its venomous poison to her entire being. It had been a calling, a constant whisper calling out her name, timidly at first, but now it was much stronger, more rude...more vigorous in its unending strife to see her locked in, constrained in this intricate web that was a lie, deception. It was proving to be cumbersome, tiring. Could she take any more, a sip of this bitter and un-godly concoction? Thats what it was, none of this was real, it couldn't be.

She exhaled deeply and looked around, trying to familiarise herself with....nothing, everything...everything was the same, everything was....nothing?

Her tale began a few months ago, she didn't feel like repeating it but...

She'd been feeling lost, lonely, low...it had been going on for a while now.
The nudge felt like a small bump, in the right direction perharps? She'd been trudging away from the right path so long she didn't even know it was wrong at all.
It just crept up on her. She wanted this. To feel alive, to feel...safe.

The nudge...led to a constant gnawing at her soul, she really needed this to be right. It had to be right...it felt right afterall.
The constant gnawing led to a benign thawing of the walls to her prison. This vast nothingness that proved to be unbearable, an unfortunate mistake.

The wall, weakened and in a dire state of disrepair, provided her the escape into this prison.
She didn't take time to think, heed that little voice in her head that had kept her alive and safe for so long, telling her to chill, to wait. She wanted it that bad.
It happened so fast she almost missed it. She was in, finally!
But she was not as happy as she thought she'd be. She missed everything, everyone.

She wanted to leave. She looked for a way out, a door, a doorknob, a key, anything to indicate that she could leave, that she was on the right path.
She didn't belong here. Sure, the construct to this prison was all hers, but it didn't feel safe anymore. She wanted to be free, needed to free her mind from this. That was the only way she could be truly free.
Perseverance, resolve and the will to 'leave' was the key.